Reflection & Inspiration

"...Your dreams are valid", said Lupita Nyong'o as she accepted an Oscar at the Academy Awards this past Saturday. Those words are the song of every woman fighting for her dreams. It made me think of mine and how far off I have become.
I started college back in 2005 and I had no idea what I wanted to do. Somehow after taking political science classes, I ended up graduating with a Bachelor of Arts in Mass Communications. I just knew I would be on my way to write for news stations like ABC7 or magazines like Essence.
After not being able to accept an investigative reporting job in Los Angeles for lack of finances, I found myself in marketing and sales. I liked it but it wasn't me. To make a long story short, I stopped following my dreams and listened to the opinions of others. Now here I am, 26, single, unemployed, and unhappy. As a black female I could blame the socioeconomic barrier, but the fault is mine. Yes there is racism and slavery today but the real culprit is belief. At some point I stopped believing in myself and what I could do. I doubted me because others had and in doing so fulfilled my worst fears. I'm broke, unhappy, and single.

The turning point was me watching the Academy Awards. To be honest, I had no interest in looking at the award program because I figured it wouldn't improve my life. A friend of mine did not have cable and wanted to watch the show along with my brother. If it was not for Lupita's acceptance speech, I wouldn't be writing at this very moment. I have been out of school for 3 years and accomplished very little. In my eyes nothing. In the eyes of others a lot.
In this game of life, we are our greatest enemy. Our belief in ourselves and others is what determines the outcomes of our lives. According to writer James Clear, "Successful people don't wait to be tapped, chosen, appointed, or nominated. They start before they feel ready. They tell themselves,'It doesn't matter whether or not it's my fault that I'm here. This is who I am and it's my responsibility to do something about it.' The chosen one choose themselves."
I feel that I am a writer, artist, and designer. The only one keeping me from my dreams is me. It's like what Whoopi's character in The Color Purple said, "I'm poor, black, I might even be ugly, but dear God I'm here. I'm here." I will never stop fighting to move forward in my life. I will never doubt myself again because I believe in the value of my dreams. They won't be dreams for long.